Your gone gone gone there is nothing left we can do.....

     
       It has been a while since I have blogged. A lot has changed since I last posted. To start off I am now divorced.... It was not an easy choice to leave my wife but it was the right one in the end. You can not have a marriage with out trust and she had left our trust in shambles.... I do not fell the need to go into detail but lets just say it is one of those things that you just don't get past. I am at the angry stage right now you know the I want to beat your face in place.... Any one... okay guess it is just me. I am angry that I did not have the self esteem to walk away from her the first time she did it.... I stayed and thought I can get past this. When you really love some one that is what you do right.....?
How the hell should I know what you do when you love some one I think I am a hopeless romantic and want to think love is all sparklie when really it is messy and hard.


         Kelli's new girl friend "bee" looks like a white trash version of me only with blond hair and blue eyes. Now folks this is not me making things up several people have agreed and even asked me if I see the resemblance. This makes no sense to me since she did not want me,. but wants a white trash, teeth missing wear to much makeup kind of version of me... If any one has an answer to this please clue me in...

Okay so I think that is the end of my rant for now.

  On the up side I am the god mother to an amazing new baby boy. Jacob is amazing..... watching him grow every day is amazing.

  I live in down town Portland now... I am close to Saturday market, food carts, and my favorite restaurant.

  I have a great room mate who is an adult and handles his shit... Imagine that.

  I still have my fur kids and they are adjusting to life with a dog.

I do not know where this path in life will take me next but as always I will receive it with my heart on my sleeve and a child like wonderment if it is going to be sparklie.



You're gone, gone, gone away
I watched you disappear
All that's left is the ghost of you.
Now we're torn, torn, torn apart,
There's nothing we can do
Just let me go we'll meet again soon
Now wait, wait, wait for me
Please hang around
I'll see you when I fall asleep  ~~~ Of monster and Men  ~~~